SHANELLE'S SHENANIGANS is the column from Bunbury Mail editor Shanelle Miller.
Twenty-five-year-old Shanelle is a self-confessed country bumpkin with a penchant for good food (and lots of it), SingStar, a cheeky cider on a summer's day and compulsive online shopping.
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EVERY so often, I get sad.
That statement might not seem unusual or worth sharing, but bear with me.
It’s not the kind of sad that you get from watching The Notebook on a rainy day or from hearing your friend’s grandma has passed away.
It’s the deep-seated, gut-wrenching dark place that descends on you late at night, ripping any chance of sleep from your grasp as your mind torments you with the possibility that things are not as bad as you thought – they are worse.
Every anxiety-ridden thought that slips into your mind is met with an unwavering negativity that seems impossible to control.
I have been in and out of this dark place for as long as I can remember – long enough to be able to take note of when it occurs and to slowly try to work out why.
Coming from a small country town where you didn’t bother with healthcare unless your leg was broken, I have never spoken to a counsellor, psychologist or anything similar and have never taken any form of antidepressant.
I guess you could call it a form of intermittent anxiety or depression - who is to say if it’s mild or moderate or what I need to do to “fix” it.
Having reported on the topic for five years, I have come to the conclusion that every single person from every corner of the community is dealing with some form of mental illness.
Can you really point to someone you know and say “That person is 100 per cent happy and nothing ever gets to them?”
Someone once described depression to me like this - “Everyone gets down from time to time. But it’s when you can’t get back up – that’s depression.”
I can tell you now that if I didn’t take my own steps towards making myself well, I would be sliding down a very slippery slope towards never being able to get back up.
This opinion will probably be unpopular with a lot of people and may not work for everyone, but I self-medicate my unhappiness by getting off my ass and moving.
Exercise is the one and only thing that has dragged me out of the black hole every single time without fail.
Over the years the method has changed – I’ve cycled, run, hit the gym and more recently CrossFit-ed – but the result is always the same.
People will probably respond by saying that my condition “can’t be that bad” if it is solved by something as simple as physical activity.
I know a lot of people are dealing with chronic depression that a quick five km around the inlet won’t fix.
I won’t argue with science or research, I will just stand by the resolution that has allowed me to be the healthy, functioning adult I am today.
Personally, I don’t really care if I’m not the fastest or fittest or what size dress I have to buy – I care about being able to go to bed at night with my back to those dark thoughts and sleep.
They are not gone forever, but they are under control.
Have your say. Do you have your own method of handling anxiety or depression? Post a comment below or email your thoughts to shanelle.miller@fairfaxmedia.com.au.
