I heard with glad dismay the news COVID-19 regulations would be eased in NSW. I was glad for my daughter, who has been struggling at 14 with a constant grounding, and for the first time in her life is wanting with every fibre of her being to go to back to school.
While she won't be looking at any normal kind of schooling any time soon, she will at least be able to see her best mate.
I was dismayed because I suddenly realised I wasn't ready. I don't want to go back to life as we know it. I have just watched the stories of incredibly patient, grateful people living their last days without their family in a hospice in England.
This pandemic is not the way anyone would wish to learn life lessons. People have died alone, people have lost their jobs, people have watched their carefully nurtured businesses wither and die.
People have been lonely, they have missed life events, they have faced the gaping black hole of depression.
But without the cacophony of our everyday lives, I have started to hear the cockatoos, seen the morning sun sneak its fingernails over the mountains, watched the butterflies on the Geisha Girls. I have scrootched up against the side of the trampoline with my girl under the stars and watched The Great Gatsby on the iPad.
While much of our time is spent in our individual iso-caves within our iso-island, my husband's oldest daughter, washed up on our shores at the start of coronavirus, has spread the picnic blanket for us all to watch the sunset together. The two sisters organised a beautiful silver anniversary dinner for us.
Work as a contractor has been steady but frustrating on our limited satellite internet. I have at least been at home to chase cows out of the garden, help with the odd bit of schoolwork and hang out the washing. I love my home.
I have seen Aussie Facebook posts about how bored people are. I have not experienced one minute of boredom. There have been many minutes of frustration and a few household combustions, but no boredom.
This is where we find out just what we have made for ourselves. There are no easy escapes to meetings, commitments - even work in many cases. We are left with the core of our lives - our family, our household, our homes.
We are being forced to remember that home is not just a place to go to at the end of the day. For those realising it is not a place they want to be, COVID-19 restrictions might be doing you a favour.
Marie Low is a freelance journalist based in Gunnedah, New South Wales.
